Al Snow – Outside The Ropes on Confidential 9/6/03   Al is being interviewed by Lance Storm and Goldust is the director.   Goldust:  Lance, I know you can do this.  Let's roll now!  Quiet please!! Lance:  Alright.  Welcome to Outside the Ropes.  I'm Lance Storm.  My guest – Al Snow.  Al, we have ten questions for you. Al:  Ok. Hit it. Lance:  Ready? Al:  Yeah. Lance:  Does it get under your skin that Mick Foley still tells Al Snow jokes? Al:  It bothers me a little bit but, uh, I think he's obsessed with me.  I think he has sexually repressed fantasies about me or something because otherwise why would he continue talking about me. Lance:  You also have a unique relationship with Bob Holly.  In fact, you had your differences on Tough Enough. Goldust:   No, no, no, no, no!!! Little more enthuuuuuu…siasm, please!! Thank you.  Keep rolling!! Lance:  Do those differences stem back to the days of the Job Squad? Al:  No, not at all.  Bob's just a bully and, you know,  a hard-ass.  He has his way and I have mine.  Lance:  You have problems with little boys? Al:  Apparently.  I don't think I have any with you. Lance:  Not yet. Al:  No. Lance:  During the three seasons of Tough Enough, what was the worst and most embarrassing audition tape you remember? Al:  Probably the kid, Scott Chong, who was dancing naked with just a paper bag on his private parts. Lance:  Was it a big paper bag? Al:  It's a big paper bag, I don't think it was necessary. Goldust:  Lance, bring the fi-i-i-re out of him, man, come on, keep rolling though. Lance:  Number four.  You have spent three years as Tough Enough's head trainer.  In that time, you referred to the contestants as your kids.  Our questions is:  Who was the bastard child? Al:  Who was the bastard (chuckles) child? Lance:  There's always one. Al:  It'll have to be Josh. Lance:  Josh? Al:  Josh Matthews.  He's a little bastard. Lance:  He's still around here? Al:  Yes, yes, he is. Lance:  Who should win this four-way fatal match:  Al Snow, Avatar, Shinobi, or Leif Cassidy?  Remember, they are all in their prime. Goldust:  My God, who's Leif Cassidy?!  Come on!!  Let's get on the ball here!! Al:  I don't think any of them could win. Lance:  Do any of them have a prime? Al:  I don't think any of them actually had a prime. Lance:  Where did Al Snow first discover Head? Al:  That was in New Britain, Connecticut. Goldust:  Keep rolling!! Let's go! Al:  Spike Dudley and Mikey Whipwreck gave me Head. Lance:  That can't be good. Al:  (Chuckles) It helped my career.  You might want to try it.  You seem a little repressed. Lance:  It might loosen me up a little bit. Al:  Anything could do it. Lance:  You have been co-hosting Sunday Night Heat for a few months now, have you learned anything from your partner? Al:  I've learned he's not as heavy to carry around as I thought. Lance:  Alrighty. Goldust:  Lance, wait, wait, wait.  Here you are, go like this..relax.  Ask the questions, read your cue cards and let's get out of here, ok?  Speed it up! Al:  I think you are going a little too slow. Lance:  You once campaigned to be WWE Commissioner. Al:  Yes. Lance:  Do you have any advice for Gary Coleman and Arnold Schwartzeneggar in their quest to be Governor of California? Al:  Yes, uh, get midgets as campaign managers.  Small people equals big ratings. Lance:  Wouldn't Gary Coleman have that covered already? Al:  It's true.  He's a midget. Lance:  Ok.  Nine.  You own over 200 hockey jerseys.  In ten seconds, name as many of those teams as you can.  Ready? Goldust:  Excuseeeeee me!! This is NOT hockey, this is wrestling, PRO Wrestling, WWE.  Lance, get that through your thick hea,.. hea,.. skull. Lance:  I didn't write the questions.  Ten seconds…Next question.  Good job, Al. Al:  (Laughs)  There's, uh….how do you deal with him (meaning Goldust)? Lance:  If there was one trash can lid left in the world, who would you hit with it? Al:  What now? (Laughs) Lance:  If there was one trash can lid left in the world, who would you hit with it? Al:  Probably myself after this interview. Lance:  If you hit him (meaning Goldust), we would be out of the woods, won't we? Al:  (Laughs)  This has been insane. Lance:  Thank you, Al.  This has been Outside the Ropes. Goldust:  And cut!! Your Reporter has been Carol.....a new HEAD staff member